Why Do I Run?

When I was younger, I thought running was stupid.

I thought people who run do it out of vanity.

To look good.

For bragging rights.

To be able to say, "I am a runner, hear me roar."

I even joined them a few times.

Run a mile here, run a mile there.

Call myself a "runner" because one mile seemed like a long way.

One mile?

But even then, I thought it was stupid.

It hurt. It made me sweat. It made me tired. 

And I always ended up in the same place I started.

It seemed a little unproductive.

But then I had a baby.

And my body changed.

And it jiggled. 

And I wept.

And I decided running was suppose to help.

And so I ran.

It hurt. It made me sweat. It made me tired.

The first day I jogged 5 minutes before breaking down.

I cried in the middle of the street.

I couldn't believe how hard it was.

Not even a mile. One mile.

But I kept doing it, day after day.

It wasn't fun.

For a long time I dreaded it. 

But it helped!

My body changed, this time for the better.

It no longer jiggled.

I no longer wept.

"So why keep going?" I thought.

So I stopped.

But then my newborn baby cried.

He cried a lot.

He had colic.

And ear problems.

I was stressed beyond belief.

Sometimes I cried, too.

It was so hard.

He cried and cried and I cried and cried.

Sometimes I felt like I was at the end of my rope.

Sometimes I needed a break.

And so I ran.

I ran because it cleared my head.

I ran to expel my frustration.

I ran to sweat. To breath.

To relieve stress.

It still hurt, but I appreciated the ability to feel pain.

With every drop of sweat, I felt relief. 

One day I realized I'd changed. 

I felt giddy anticipation before each run.

I didn't dread it.

One mile. Two miles. Three miles.

Four. Five. Six. Seven...

I haven't stopped since. 

I don't want to. 

Why do I run? 

I run to look good. I run so I can eat more!

I run to experience the utter exhaustion at the end. 

I run to feel my heart pumping vigorously,

pumping blood throughout my body.

Pumping life throughout my body.

I run to relieve stress. Anger. 

I run because someday I'll be old

and I'll look back and wish I had taken advantage

of these legs, these muscles. My health. Youth.

The world looks different when you run. 

It looks bigger. Brighter. Majestic.

I run to experience the beauty in it all.

I run for my mind.

My soul.

Why do I run?

For Me.